Natural Mama: Changes since I became a mom

I remember when I was pregnant I would envision what it would be like to be a mommy. All the laughter, long naps, cuddles and goodnight stories. I knew it would be tough in the beginning with sleepless nights and marathon nursing sessions. And those most definitely happened! But I did not know just exactly what I was in for....especially with the changes within me personally.

The biggest change is learning to go with the flow. No two days are alike, so a routine girl like me who likes to have a set schedule has had to learned to let go and let it be. It was difficult at first. I would get into a routine, then Bodie would shake it up, or he would grow out of it. Like napping and eating, some days he has long naps, some days he has super short naps. I can't plan on getting too much done during nap time because it can go either way. I have TRIED to let go of having the house clean and orderly all the time. There are just some days where I get nothing done because all my attention is on Bodie or we are on play dates. I was never a spur of the moment person either. Everything was always planned out in advance. I am still working on this one, but I am learning to be OK with spur of the moment outings and a complete change of plans is not unheard of! Having to adjust to this was hard, but I don't get anxious about not having a routine anymore. Instead, I wake up and ask God to guide our day and to help me move through any changes with grace and ease.

One the of the BIGGEST changes is my relationship with diet and exercise. A few years ago I was a stickler for having a perfect diet (even having an eating disorder when I was 24) and getting in a run or a trip to the gym every day. Thankfully I gave up that addiction long before I got pregnant but I still went to the gym fairly regularly when I was pregnant. Once Bodie was born, ALL my attention was on him, yet I yearned to get in the gym. I tried to carve out time in the mornings and Andrew was so gracious to watch Bodie while I went, but I quickly learned that it was not a priority for me anymore. My priority was being a mom and that I could get back into exercise down the road IF I so desired. Instead, I took walks with Bodie or did some quick exercises at home. That need and drive to get in a workout everyday has completely dissipated. I have no exercise routine AT ALL. I don't feel guilty if I don't work out anymore, quite a change from my old days. But don't get me wrong. I still get those urges that I NEED to look a certain way because society says so. Or that you are not a good mom unless you are a super mom who can exercise AND cook meals AND have a spotless house AND raise a super amazing boy. I refuse to push myself because my body is still telling me that it needs to heal.

My eating has completely changed as well, but I think I will write on this subject in a different post. A dear friend of mine as inspired me to open up about my eating disorder and how I have completely changed my eating habits and relationship with food. My son really has been a blessing in SO many ways. God is doing a good work in me through him!

How have I managed to get through some of these major changes? Prayer. God has carried me through the entire road. If I didn't have prayer I would be a mess. When I feel temptation to give up, I turn to God and I get an instant release and peaceful feeling. Just yesterday I was having an anxious day and I turned to God, that anxious feeling lifted and I was able to move forward. I let go and let God. And my amazing husband has been there to help through as well :)

Now...to lighten the mood...here is a recap of our week through pictures....